2008 WAS great in many ways. 2009 WILL be fine.

This has been a year of changes. Most of them really good. Our goal to move to Hawaii was realized. It makes my heart happy to be here. The beauty takes my breath away at times. I actually did not know how much I missed this land until I came back in April. The very smell of the air, the taste of the water, the blue of the sky and the many colors of the ocean, were things that I was aching to experience again.

Now we are here. We have family here. We have friends here. It is good, very good. Sure, things can be better, and things WILL be better. But, all in all, 2008 was a great year for me.

Rachel and U'i Lani live next door. They got to move into the empty duplex next to us at the beginning of December. This has been wonderful, giving all 4 of us much more room, but still letting us be close. Of course the bills are more. I am trusting that there will be more income. I can feel it will happen.

I'm surprised beyond belief that Jason is doing as well as he is. We had hopes that he would be in a drug testing program but that hasn't panned out. It is OK. He is OK. He is holding his own, fighting for his life and still having a good time. Today he is in Colorado Springs, enjoying our Maya. In two weeks he will go back to Kentucky. I believe he made 4 trips there in 2008. That is amazing in itself. He made a trip to San Diego, was there the week before we came to Hawaii. He made two trips to Seattle. His art is becoming more and more amazing. Both tattoo work and his other art. His writing is actually becoming famous on myspace and some other sites. He continues to make his mark. I know that is why he is still here, he has much unfinished business. I hope his unfinished business keeps him here for many more years. But I am grateful for the time we have had. I want to see him in 2009. That is my big hope for the coming year.

Jeremy and Hannah came to see us in June. They brought Micah, my first grandson. What a sweetie. He is never without a smile. Happy, happy. A joy to be around. He came just before his first birthday. Walking and talking already. We had so much fun. They went home too soon. We got lucky, because Hannah and Micah came back in November and spent two weeks. He had grown so much. Is a little person at 17 months. Wonderful sense of humor, even in a child that young. We spent two weeks laughing with him.

On the down side....David is not doing well. He is weaker and weaker. More and more dependent. It is sad. I see signs of either Alzhiemers or Dementia. At only 67, that is too young. The doctors say that is not that unusual in someone with post-polio.

Things we are looking forward to in 2009......Bernadette and Raymond will visit for the month in February. YAYE!!! Marilyn is coming for two weeks in March, bringing our cats! DOUBLE YAYE! We are looking forward to being a complete family again once Munchkin and Minnie are back with us. My hope is that 2009 will be a happy and healthy and FINE year for all of us. 2009, all will be fine. That is our motto.

Happy New Year to those of you who may happen upon this post.

Kat

Found a NEW website for selling. Ebay Alternative

I'm super excited about this new website called Bonanzle. I opened an account last night and have been checking it out all day today, between cooking and eating our turkey with all the fixings. My booth name (like an ebay store, but better) is Fromhawaii2you.

The #1 cool thing about the site is that it costs NOTHING to list. You only pay if you sell something. And you pay alot less than you do on Ebay. So, for now, I am going to try to list on there and see what happens. It is new, but growing every day. It has online chat for each booth, which is kinda like the ebay blogs, with real time chatting. Interesting and fun. I'm putting in a link, I hope it takes you to the site, but I'm new at doing that. If you click on my items on the right hand side of my blog, it takes you right to that site. HAPPY DAY.

Kat

Click here: Bonanzle

Why did they think we were terrorists???

Barb and I took alot of trips for her business. We would go to Reno or Vegas two to three times a year. (You can read about Barb in my previous post about the pig). We were always buying alot of stuff at the trade shows and bringing the stuff back in our luggage to save on shipping costs to our homes in Hawaii.
One memorable trip we knew we were going to bring as much stuff back as possible so both of us took the biggest two suitcases we had and put one inside the other. These four suitcases were totally empty. Then we each brought a backpack carry on bag. (Don't you miss being able to have two check in bags and one carry on? those were the days). We packed things in the carry ons that were stuff that were destined for goodwill or to throw away as we were going to use these bags for merchandise too upon departure.
Sooooo, we go to the trade show. This is a huge gun and knife and bow and arrow trade show that is in Reno every year. We bought as many guns, knives and bows and crossbows, etc. as could fit in our bags. We threw all the packaging for these items away (actually we left them in our hotel room for the maid to throw away). We left our clothes and for some reason the night before we had both decided to color our hair, and Barb gave me a haircut.
IMAGINE our surprise when we checked out that morning, to be stopped not just by the hotel security but by the Reno Police department!!!!
We could not figure out what we had done wrong. The "good cop" had to spell out to us just how shady it looked to have the packages to a bunch of rifles and handguns and knives and bows and crossbows in our hotel room. We had packed everything legally, with the proper locks, etc. What we hadn't realized was that the maid was scared out of her mind when she saw all that stuff, plus our clothes plus our hair dye boxes and I guess the hair from my haircut was the true crowning touch.
We missed our plane. We got interrogated. Finally, the fine Reno police department realized we were just a couple of dizzy dames from Hawaii and we were escorted to the next available flight.
I wonder if I am still on some WATCH list?
Kat

Gift for my brother....who has everything, but not a pig!

John, my oldest brother is quite wealthy. He has a daughter named Jennifer and a wife named Jane. The women in my brother's family used to be real snobs. They thought their chit didn't stink and they were always trying to show how they were better than anyone else. They have changed over the years and are now nice women, but a few years back, it was a different story.

Jane and Jennifer took up horse riding. My brother bought them horses. Jane couldn't just ride a horse, she had to go in for English riding, with her jodhophurs, and side saddle, and all that pomp and circumstance, she looked liked she was going after the foxes. Her horses were all registered quarter horses or something like that. Something impressive. Jennifer had an apaloosa pony. They called them spotted shetlands I believe. An expensive and impressive registered breed.

I lived in Hawaii at the time and my brother and his family lived in Washington State. My best friend here in Hawaii is named Barb. She and I used to travel ALOT to go to trade shows for the business she and her husband had here in Hawaii, which was a camping store that also sold guns, ammunition, etc. Barb had met my brother and his wife and we used to talk stink about Jane and Jennifer because those two were not very nice to my brother. How they could be mean to someone as easy going and generous as he is, is beyond me, but like I said, their chit didn't stink. Anyway, we kept hearing all about the REGISTERED animals Jane and Jennifer had and Barb and I thought John needed a REGISTERED animal of his own. Now, John is not like that. He doesn't care for pomp and circumstance, but we thought we would give him some.

Barb and I were in Reno, NV for a trade show. We met this dealer who sold pot-bellied pigs when he wasn't dealing cards. We were going to drive from Reno to Washington to see my brother and his family and to meet up with my parents, who were going to be there too, they were coming in their motorhome.

Barb and I went out to the dealer's ranch and we got John this cute little pot-bellied pig. It had a harness and leash and everything. We had her name registered, we named her in honor of my sister-in-law.....the pig was named Tita Kini (pronounced KEE NEE). This is an Hawaiian name and it translates to Bitch Jane.

We put Tita Kini in a cat carrier for the ride to Washington. We were going to drive straight thru, I think it was like a 12 hour drive and we set out early in the afternoon, expecting to drive all night and arrive the next morning. All went well, until the little pig stunk up the car when she defecated. So we drove to a grocery store and bought some baby wipes. Barb and I pulled up in an alley not far from the grocery store. I put the little harness on the sweet little pig and my job was to hold the pig while Barb wiped its little butt. WELLLLLLLLLLL...........we opened the cage and the pig bolted. I hung on for dear life to the harness and leash. The pig SQUEALED and omg, we were so scared that we were going to get arrested. That little thing was so loud and it sounded like it was a child being tortured to death. It was awful. I was laughing so hard, that the pig nearly got away from me. They are STRONG. Barb wiped its butt, wiped out the cat carrier and we stuffed that pig back in there and took off like bats out of hell. We were sure some cop would be hot on our tails. We drove the rest of the night and decided that if the pig pooped or peed, it would just have to stay there. We got to my brother's town around 6am.

John had told us to call him when we got there and he would meet us at a diner that was easy to find and then he would lead us back to his farm. It was way out in the boonies and really hard to find. So, we called him and he met us for breakfast and we showed him his little REGISTERED pig. He was in love with that cute little thing, love at first sight. We told John NOT to let the pig out of the carrier when we got to his house. To put the carrier in a stall in the barn and let the pig get used to that before letting her out. We WARNED HIM.

Well, when we got to the farm, everyone was still asleep. My parents out in their Motorhome, and Jane and Jennifer in the house. Mom and Dad heard us drive up and came out to see us. John was so proud of Tita Kini that he decided he was going to take her for a little walk. He hooked up the leash to the harness and opened that cat carrier. Tita Kini SQUEALED and bolted. John hung on for dear life and that pig just kept on SQUEALING. The registered horses came bolting out of the barn. Jane and Jennifer came bolting out of the house.

Barb and I were NOT on Jane and Jennifer's good list. I was NO LONGER the favorite Auntie. Those two never did like Tita Kini. John loved her. After all, he finally had his own REGISTERED animal!

Poet's Corner From the pen of a 5 year old.

Today U'iLani discovered poetry. She has a little diary that she has been drawing in and recently started writing thoughts. Today she wrote poetry. Three wonderful poems.

Here they are, exactly as she wrote them.

My Mom Book

Mom is grat

She is so grat

My mom

Nana Book

Nana is grat

She culiz with me (cuddles)

My Nana

My Dad Book

My Dad is grat

Hee thix (thinks) that he is veree smot (smart)

My Dad

Not bad at all for first attempts and very astute, she captured each of us! Still laughing at this kid, you just never know what is going to come out of her little mind.

Time, just give me some time!

I used to think certain things were my most precious commodities. Like my doll collection, handed down from my great-grandma, to grandma, to mom, then to me. But ex-hubby destroyed that when he left me for another woman. It was his way of retaliating when I wrecked his girlfriend's brand new corvette. He systematically went thru the house and destroyed anything personal or precious to me. So, I got over being attached to material things.

As I matured I realized that people are what is most precious. I've let friendships lapse, it was easy to do when I moved and got busy. Recently I've gone back, looked up old friends, renewed our friendships. It has been strange. Though I hadn't talked to some of these people in maybe 10 years, once I called and got over the inital ackwardness, it seemed as if we had never stopped talking. Now these precious friends are people I call at least once a month. They are my new/old support group. It has been wonderful realizing that the very people I counted on as a young woman and young mother are STILL here for me today.

Recently, as in the past two and a half years, what I cherish and miss ALOT is time. TIME to be alone. TIME for myself, with no one needing me for anything. I've lost this commodity. My time belongs to others. I am TRYING to carve out a time just for me. Even a few hours. So far it has not been working. I have people I take care of. Medically, physically, emotionally. But I NEED TIME to renew myself. To take care of ME.

Last week I had a long talk with David, my husband. We are trying to figure out how to lessen the burden I have in caring for him. So far, we haven't figured it out, but we are at least discussing possibilites. He is in a wheelchair. He is very weak, as in too weak to transfer himself, too weak to lift his one good arm high enough to even make a sandwich or dress himself. I literally do everything for him, including bathe him and wipe his butt. He can only be left alone for very short periods of TIME and has to be in bed when I leave him alone. This is so he can urinate on his own, using the hand held urinal. He can't urinate any more from his wheelchair alone, he hasn't the strength to move himself in the way he has to in order to pee. But he is petrified to be left alone on the bed if there is no one in the house, as he has a huge phobia about fire. He is afraid of being trapped on the bed should there be an emergency. I can understand this as there is no way he can get up on his own. I use a hoyer lift to transfer him from the bed to his wheelchair as it is. Due to his many medical problems, we also have numerous doctor visits in a week. I have to go with him to all of these as he can't use the toilet without help. So, this dependence of his is something that makes my TIME not my own.

Then there is my grand daughter, U'iLani. She is in kindergarten. She and my daughter Rachel live with us. Rachel works long hours. She leaves our house at 6:30am, often getting home late. U'iLani has a full schedule of activities. Arts and crafts, swimming lessons, karate class, plus daily homework. Yes, even in kindergarten they have daily homework. Rachel is gone for most of these activities so David and I take her. We enjoy it but it is something that tends to restrict our already full schedule. We work around her activities for the most part. I walk her to and from school each morning and we walk to all her activities. Luckily the farthest one is only one mile away, so this is good exercise but is of course, TIME consuming.

Ok, I could take some TIME for myself in the evenings, when Rachel is home. But after a full day of doing all that I do, I am tired. I don't want to leave the house. But if I am at home, I am not going to be able to do anything by myself. Our house is tiny. There is nowhere I can be alone unless Rachel and U'i are in bed. If they are in bed, I can have the living room to myself, hoping, hoping that David will not need me for something. It is sad when he calls me....."Sweets, can you come here". Just hearing "Sweets", makes me cringe. It means I have to DO something. This sounds harsh. But it is true. There is no more sex. There is only CARE giving. There is no more giving to me....there is only me DOING for him. It exhausts me. He is going to be 67 this December. I am 52. But I live the life of an invalid. We don't qualify for respite. But I NEED respite. Ok, enough griping. Cherish the TIME you have, because one day, you too might need TIME and it just might not be there for you.

Ok, gonna try this again.

I deleted all my previous blog posts, they were way too whiney. Reminder to self, don't post when you are having a pity party or depressed. LOL.

Today we are going to visit a state park after U'i Lani gets home from school. It should be fun to hike around and visit the marina right next to the park. U'i is the only one who has been here, she went last year with her pre-school for a field trip. She is really excited to be showing the park off to us and afterwards we are going to the mall for dinner and maybe a movie. She loves riding the Handivan and is getting to know the local drivers very well. I think the attraction of the Handivan is that she sits up high and can see better than in a car or on the city bus. School gets out early on Wednesdays so going on a little field trip of our own is going to be our new tradition. This gives Rachel a chance to come home to the house by herself and unwind after work. She says she will meet us at the mall later. The mall is within walking distance of home, so we will walk back afterwards. Here's hoping for a GREAT DAY.